I came up with a list of possible titles if I were ever to write a book or more specifically an autobiography:

Never Trust a Skinny Baker

The View From a Short Girl in High Heels

Cupcakes, Boobies, and Other Fun Things

Memoirs of a Book Whore

Dear God, Am I Related to Santa Claus? 

From Closet Nerd to Preppy Geek

Cupcake Drunk 

Save a Bookcase, Buy a Book

Awkward Turtles, Little Cows

Dear God, Are You Sure I'm Not An Elf? 

Let Me Slap the Stupid Off Your Face

Yes. I Am Laughing At You. 

Please Get Out of the Bathroom. I Have to Pee.