Delilah - Misunderstood

The woman who was Samson's downfall. The temptress. Sly and cunning. A bad girl.

The meaning of her name varied with each site I looked at. One said it was "The One Who Weakened" another said "Delicate" and still another said "Languishing, Lovelorn, Seductive". Christian families don't even name their girls Delilah because it tends to make most think of the word: "whore" or "deceiver".

She's always intrigued me. She steps into Samson's history in Judges 16 and then leaves as quickly as her name appears.

Many people have said she was a prostitute. I won't profess to know exactly what she did, because the Bible doesn't say. There is mention of a prostitute earlier in chapter, but that was a different woman, in a different city. She isn't even named. She was just a woman Samson slept with...nothing more...nothing less.
Then Delilah enters the story. She is named. The only woman in Samson's history that was named. Not even his own mother was named. Not even his first wife. I think that's why she is so remembered. There is power is saying someone's name. I think that's why she sticks out like a sore thumb here...she has a name...it makes her very human...and very real.

Delilah. Maybe she was a widow. Oblivious she wasn't married since Samson was with her. Maybe she was a courtesan. Who knows. All we know is that she is a woman named Delilah and that Samson was in love with her. I like how it says that he was in love with her...it never says that she was in love with him. Maybe she liked him. Maybe she just put up with him. I can't imagine he smelled very good. Either way it doesn't make mention of her feelings toward him. If she was a prostitute I can't imagine that she would be head over heals about him...I mean come on people this isn't a scene from Pretty Woman.

Well of course the Philistines would hear about where he was and so they came running to D. They told her to "entice" (another version says "lure") Samson so that he would tell her where his strength came from. Ah. So this is where people come in and say "See! She was a prostitute! It was all her fault! She used her womanly charm to cause the fall of this man!" A man who I might add is quite a douche bag. I mean really...just read his story. Who in the world would ever want to be this pouty, revengeful man even if he had great strength?! Anywho...

So the story goes on to say that she lured him...and seduced him...and spoke softly...and batted her long eyelashes... Hahaha. No. Oh no. Go look. What does she do? It says she directly asked him "Please tell me where your great strength lies, and with what you may be bound to afflict you." Oh yes. That was very seductive. I mean how obvious can you get? She goes up and says "Hey dude. I know you're strong and think you're better than a happy meal, but come on... How are you so strong and what can you be tied up with. Wha?! Hey...get your mind out of the gutter. I need to know what's gonna hurt you."

I don't know about you, but when I'm trying to be all sexy and wily I don't ask a very direct question to my husband... You tip toe and dance and sashay your way through it so you don't get caught in your "lure". She doesn't even bother. D just sets it out on the table for Samson. So he gives her an answer. An incorrect one at that. I can't imagine when she did what he said and then yells out "Omg! The Po-Po are here for you!" that she was thrilled that he lied to her. I can imagine he probably laughed at her...and she was upset. So what does she do? She tried again and again. Three times she asks, and three times he makes a joke out of it.

D probably was seeing the money that would free her from whatever life she was living, slowly slipping away. She probably wanted to be a free woman. The leaders EACH promised her money. Not just one leader, but all of them. That would be a lot of money. A lot of freedom. She might have a chance at something...whatever she wanted. We like to get our panties in a knot and say "Oh we would never sell out a man for money." But that era was different from this. If she didn't love him, if it was just a job, and this man was her country's enemy why in the world would she not do it? I'm sorry...maybe I'm just ready it wrong, but why does that make her a "treacherous woman"??

So finally after:

"she pestered him daily with her words and pressed him, so that his soul was vexed to death, that he told her all his heart"
"such nagging she prodded him day after day until he was tired to death. So he told her everything."

"day after day she nagged him until he couldn't stand it any longer. Finally, Samson told her his secret."

Wow. All she did was nag the crap out of him! Nag...nag...nag. No luring...no seducing... Pestering got her the answer. This actually is very reminiscent of what happened to Samson during his wedding festivities. His wife nagged him about the riddle and he gave her the answer and then killed a bunch of people to get back at them. Hmm. Wow. Prophetic much?

Now I'm not saying this makes Delilah all fine and good. No one likes a nagging woman. I don't even like when I'm nagging. Ew. But I'm surprised at the slamming she's received about something that she didn't do. She was doing a job...not a good job...but it was her job. And Samson caved. I don't think a seductive woman was his downfall...it was a nagging woman. But actually...let's put the blame where it belongs. He made a choice and he told her. He ultimately was his own downfall.

I'm curious about why the writer of Judges doesn't talk about her emotions during this time. I think that's lent to people making her out to be a cold-hearted bitch. I'm curious about her thoughts during this time. What was she feeling? Pressured? Indifferent? Lonely? Cruel? Angry? Sad? Used? I wish I could ask her...

But I think at the end "tender" would be her word. She knew right away that what he told her was the truth. Was it the way he told her? Did it get quiet in the room? She had him fall asleep on her lap. That reminds me of a mother soothing her child to sleep...stroking the child's hair...singing a lullaby... It's a tender position. Each time Delilah tried to figure out what was his secret was she carried out the act herself. But this time...while his head was in her lap she had someone else cut his hair. I wonder if she felt sympathy for him. Giving him some last minute comfort before his demise. I wonder if she thought the Philistines would just kill him quickly. Take no chances. They hated him beyond anything else why wouldn't they just get it over and done with. I wonder what she thought when they tortured him. Did she care? Or had she left her home for something greater and better for herself?

Samson doesn't even blame her. He says nothing about "Curse that evil woman!" "Damn she tricked me!" "It's all her fault!". Delilah betrayed him, but he doesn't utter a single word against her. Maybe he knew the whole time how it would play out. Maybe he knew she didn't love him and she needed to look out for herself first. I don't know what he thought, but I'm curious.

Why do people point their fingers at this woman and "tsk tsk" at her. They call her a deceiver. A slut. So smart and cunning...what a snake. But reading this story again I can't call her a bad girl. I am left feeling extremely curious about her. I feel for her. This was a messy and chaotic story. A story she was named in. Oh yes, she told his secret to his enemies. Yeah, he should feel betrayed. She did something that doesn't exactly fall into a black/white category. Man, there is so much more surrounding this story than is written.

Delilah. Not a bad girl. Not a good girl. Just a woman with a story.